Man dies of thirst at McDonald's

Well this is almost true.

It irks me that I get a half sized portion at McDonald's for twice the price I used to pay in the USA.

However what really pisses me off when I can't even get a cup of water particularly as water is free in McDonalds in the USA.

So now I have slightly better service as the foreign staff mainly speak English, or at least the managers do. However I only wanted a cup of water as the tea was so hot I could not taste it.

Muttering in the corner listening to their tradesman hammering I wondered if I would have to pay to use the toilet or whether I would be shafted in a different way.

No fee, I was in heaven until I seen the blocked loo. It is always nice to see crap floating in a pan just after you have eaten. However a man has to do what a man has to do. So being educated in the finer points of health I decided to wash my hands. Problem was the sink was no more than 10 inches wide and would have been perfect for a child on a large stool.

So I persevered and washed my hands the best I could with the skin stripping boiling water and missing soap. Thank god we have hand dryer, which actually cause more germs. But I was safe the germs were not in with a shout as the drier was broken.

I must admit I did feel bad wiping my wet germ filled hands on the door handle the tradesman had just fixed.

So I apologise to the McDonalds of Gylemuir Road, Corstorphine, Edinburgh, I will not be back, I shall drive the 50 miles home and drink water from my own tap, for no other reason that you are the filthiest McDonalds if have ever had the misfortune to endure.