New continent found, stake your claim

It is true a new continent has been discovered between Hawaii and Japan that is actually twice the size of the USA.

Now you are probably wondering why has no one noticed it, surely with all our spy satellites some one must know it is there?

Well the truth is big brother wishes to keep it quite as this new continent is rubbish. Yes it is true it has very little oil, virtually no valuable minerals and of limited use, so no country is ready to spill blood for it.

So your probably wondering just how bad this continent really is if know one actually wants it or for that matter even wishes to mention it. The fact is it is rubbish but when I say rubbish I really mean real rubbish, like plastic bags, fast food boxes and all those little crappy plastic things we all throw away that never actually disappear.

It is almost like a Bermuda triangle for crap no one wants. However relax, there may be a day when you can stake your claim as this continent is growing daily as over a million sea birds a year and 100,000 mammals each year die because of the plastic we dump in the sea.

Once we have a sufficiently high pile of birds and animals then we can claim this continent for Scotland and wait a few million years for their rotten corpses to turn to oil.